"Some days are made for smoking" Brainpool

George tried to concentrate on his computer but he failed.The reason for that was simple.John was sitting on his left side.So near that he could feel the warmth of his body and this was enough to drive him insane.He looked tohis friend and sighed."What's up George?"George winced.He hadn't realized that he sighed."Nothing.""Really?You look awful.""Oh,thank you.I'd love it when you're making me compliments.""George,you know that I didn't mean it this way.I'm just concearned.You seem to be a little bit unconcentrated in the last few weeks."George was shocked.He hadn't noticed that his feelings affect so obviously his work."Hey George,we're friends.So just tell me what's up""It's nothing.Really""OK.You would tell me if anything is wrong?""Yeah.Of course."With that they returned to their work.Or better,John returned to his work,George still pretended that he was working.

He was very relieved when they finished and he could go home.But he couldn't get away.Samantha Walters waited for him and he could see in her eyes that there was something serious going on."George,I have to talk with you."They went into her office."George,what's up with you?" He couln't believe it.Who else had noticed that he behave strange.Damm,he hasn't realized it himself."Why do all people ask me that?I'm ok.It's nothing wrong with me.""Perhaps the other will believe you,but I don't.I can see that there's something going on.You can tell me.I'll not go to John and tell it him""Sorry,I don't understand what you mean with that.Why John.What has he to do with it?"George was near screaming.She knew it."Oh come on George.You can't hide it.What you're feeling for John is more than just friendship." "What?!You're wrong!John is just a friend for me."Look me in the eyes and say it again."George wanted desperately to do that,but he couldn't.He just couldn't.

The next day George went straight to the office of Baily Malone.Without knocking he entered the room and put a paper on the the table."What's that?""My written notice.This is my last day here.""What?Why? George is something wrong?You know we can talk about everything!""No.We can't talk about this.There's no way you could help me this time.I'm very sorry that I put this on you but I can't stay.I have to go...It's for me."Then he simply turned around and left Baily sitting surprised in his office without any idea what was going on.

"He did what?" John couln't believe it.Why hadn't George told him about his plans?"I knew there was something wrong but he didn't want to tell me.Did he tell you why he's leaving?""No.Sam?Do you have any idea?""No"Sam looked down.She knew the reason but she couldn't tell it Baily as long as John was still there.She couldn't do that to George.After John left she turned to Baily "He's in love with John""Jesus.The poor boy.I guess now I understand why he wants to leave.And I should let him.""You will" "Yeah,I will."

John knew that he was driving to fast,but he didn't slow down.He was angry.Why hadn't George told him?I'm his best friend and I thought that George would tell me his problems.He felt betrayed and insulted.They would have to talk.Now.George couldn't run away from me.When John arrived at George's home he was much more furious than before.He nearly destroyed the door when he knocked.

George opened the door and looked surprised in John's angry face."Why didn't you talk to me?What the hell did you think?Did you think?How could you do that?Tell me how"Now he was screaming and George was totally shocked.He didn't knew that John meant the job because he couldn't imagine that he was so important for John that he would freak out when George left."Who told you?""Baily did""Oh my God ,why did he knew this.Sam had promised me that she wouldn't tell someone about my feelings for you.I'm so sorry John.I didn't want this,I wanted you as a friend and I still want you but not in this way anymore.I'm so sorry John.I know you must hate me now and I don't blame you for that.I hope you can forgive me someday.Please leave now."Than George closed the door.He couldn't bear to see the face of his former friend.It was all to much for him.John standed in front of the door and felt like he couldn't breathe anymore.Like he would never be able to breathe again.Than he left.

The whole weekend John thought about George.George his best friend,his support,his help.And his... No,he didn't want to think about that.He still couldn't believe that George felt in love with him.When had that happen?Why hadn't he noticed?What should he do?He doesn't love men.No...absolutely not.Then why does he think all the time about George?Why did he care? *Because he is your best friend you idiot and you should help him and not planning how to avoid him.But I will not have to avoid him.George wouldn't come back.I will never see him again.Damn,that hurts.*

George was furious.He couldn't believe that he forgot the disk.And he couldn't believe that he would have to go to his former working place to get it.

*It is just monday morning and I'm beginning to hate this week.*John felt tired and angry.Some of the otheragents had heard when Sam told Baily that George was in love with John and now they were making some filthy jokes about him and when they thought he didn't look they made perverse signs and moves.He always knew that the FBI was intolerant when it came to gays but he never thought he would get problems with that."Hey Grant where's your lover?"*Oh no,not this son of a bitch!* Special Agent Peters was a tall man with short blond hair and brown eyes.And he was one of those men who think that gays have no right to exist.John had never liked him.Even before he met George.But he knew that Peters was popular with the other agents and he had to make this clear before this ended in a professional catastrophy for him."Peters,I don't want to disappoint you but I'm not gay.And Fraley isn't "my lover.""Sorry,but I don't believe you.And because of that I'll send a complaint to the high bosses."*Oh my God!This is going wrong!I have to stop that.*"Listen,I'm not gay..."John didn't realised that

Baily,Sam and George entered the room this moment and he didn't see what his next words did to George."...I wasn't keen on working with him,to say it :I hated it.*What am I saying? I'll never forgive me for that.Oh George I'm sorry.*I always feared he would touch me.""Why haven't you told me about that?I would have leave the job earlier."John's heart broke as he turned around and saw in the face of his friend.*No,please this must be a dream.*Baily and Sam looked angry and shocked but this didn't hurt John like the sad and lonely look in Georges eyes.Then George turned away and runned out of the room.

John escaped and went home.*Why have I did that?Why?I have to talk to him.I have to explain this.*But he couldn't.He knew George would never forgive him for this betrayal.He tried to imagine his life without George.It would be lonely without him.Without the laughter,the jokes,the conversations and all the possibilities.*Possibilities? Fuck!Why haven't I noticed before?Oh my God.I love him!I love him!*John ran out of his apartment, took his Porsche and drove like an insane monkey to Georges apartement.

George didn't react to his knockings."Please George I'm sorry.Open the door,we have to talk!"Then he heard noises from the roof.It was Sam's voice.Something is wrong here.He climbed the stairs and opened the door.The scene he saw was unbelieveable.George was standing at the abyss like he wanted to jump in every moment.Sam and Baily stood near to him and John could hear her soft voice trying to convince him to come to her."Oh my God! George!" Baily turned to him."John,please leave.He went through so much because of you.Your presence isn't so good right now.""But...Baily I didn't meant what I said.I was never afraid or angry about working with him.I was always glad to have a partner and friend like him.Please let me talk to him."He could see that Baily would say no but Sam looked in his eyes and he knew that this was enough for her to know what was going on with him."Fine.Talk to him." Carefully he stepped to his former friend and hopefully his prospective lover."Hey George.""What are you doing here? You feared that I could touch you ,you were angry because you have to work with me. So what are you doing here?""George these were all lies.I didn't meant one word and I'm so sorry I said them."There were no reaction from George and he knew he had to confess all."George I....I love you."But the reaction he got was not the one he thought he would get."Oh come on,cut this crap,ok? You're just telling this because you fear Sam and Baily would blame you for my death"What? How could he possibly believe that?John saw in George's eyes and saw the stubborn look he knew to well.He wouldn't be able to change his opinion with words.So he stepped to George and wrapped his arms around him."If you fall I will fall too""John""I love you,please believe me,I love you"Then he took his friend away from the abyss.

End